There are many different types of loss a friend can experience. A loved one can pass away. They could lose something important to them, such as a job, a pet, or a home. An injury from an accident could even cause a friend to feel like they’ve lost a part of themselves. No matter what the loss is, you want to show your support to the person who’s grieving.
Some losses, however, can be grave enough to leave everyone at a loss for words. Finding something comforting to say in a friend’s moment of need isn’t always easy. And, at times, words alone won’t be enough. In these cases, giving something that expresses what you can’t say can be more appropriate. Let’s look at a few suggestions.
Easy-to-Prep Meals
It’s difficult to process a loss, but even more challenging to try to function while you’re grieving. Basic tasks like getting dressed and preparing meals seem insurmountable when you don’t have the energy. Certain losses, such as serious injuries and illnesses, may even make tackling some of life’s basics impossible.
Giving your friend a sympathy gift with already prepped meals is a way to take care of one of life’s essentials. Gift baskets with soups and desserts are an example. All your friend has to do is heat the soup, pasta, and bread. Desserts like cookies and pastries don’t require any prep work. The gift of a meal gives your friend physical nourishment when they may not be thinking about caring for themselves.
Already or easy-to-prep meals mean friends don’t have to extend energy they don’t have. Alternatives to gift baskets include meal delivery services and restaurant gift cards. However, gift baskets let you include a personalized message to your friend and additional comfort items. You can add blankets, meditation books, and self-care kits.
Your Time
Giving your time might seem like it’s not much. But it can make a world of difference to a grieving friend whose life has been disrupted. People who are grieving may have difficulties with decisions and daily activities. Your friend may not be sleeping well or is unable to concentrate.
Often, those going through a loss will experience highs and lows. They might cope well one day, but be completely unable to do much the next. Individuals processing a loss could also feel isolated and need someone to listen to them. They may not have all the words for their emotions but want to express them with a person they trust.
Being there for your friend by giving your time can look like running their errands and doing their laundry. You could also sit with them. Spend a day, an evening, or an afternoon. You don’t have to go out if your friend doesn’t feel up to it yet. But when they do, taking them to a movie or one of their favorite places can help restore a sense of normalcy.
Self-Care Services
With loss comes stress. It’s an emotional event that impacts both mental and physical well-being. Losing a loved one is known to cause your body to activate its high-alert system. Your immune system goes on overdrive to protect you from a sense of danger. As a result, inflammation within your body goes up.
Increased inflammation, especially when it lasts a long time, can lead to physical symptoms. In some cases, prolonged inflammation may trigger illnesses. The lack of sleep that comes from grief only exacerbates an inflammatory response. Your friend may be experiencing increased sensitivity to pain, indigestion, weariness, headaches, and overall exhaustion.
Giving them the gift of self-care services, such as a spa day, can alleviate the physical symptoms of stress. A spa day lets them relax in a soothing environment, helping them physically relax and address symptoms like built-up muscle tension. Other self-care services you can give a grieving friend include haircuts, meditation sessions, and yoga classes.
Grief Books and Journals
Your friend may not be ready to talk about their loss just yet. And it’s possible they would rather find other ways to work through the process than have someone lend an ear. Some people express their thoughts and emotions better in writing when they’re alone. Or, they find comfort in the words of others who have gone through similar experiences.
Giving your friend grief journals and books shows you support them. You recognize their need to process their loss in their own way. You’re not forcing them to talk, but you’re also saying you’re there for them. If you know of a helpful book about grief, you can give it to them with a sympathy card.
For those who aren’t sure what books and journals might be beneficial, you can start with online forums. Ask family members and other friends if they have suggestions. You might also consider asking a local librarian or trained grief counselor. Lists from major publications are another good place to check.
Helping a Grieving Friend
Loss is a universal experience. Most people go through it multiple times if they live long enough. Although grief is often cumulative, each loss is unique and difficult to handle. When you’re indirectly impacted by a friend’s experience, you may not be able to find enough words to express your support. Gifts that cover life’s essentials can say what words can’t while helping your friend start the recovery process.
